Pea Soup Thick Fog

I am so frustrated with never knowing where anything is or what day it is or what I'm supposed to be doing when I get somewhere.  Today I got my daughter all dressed up, I put makeup on and I dragged my husband out.  The local newspaper had called for all 2010 babies and parents to meet at a local restaurant to get our pictures taken and have a pizza lunch.  I'd entered the date and time into my Blackberry.  When we walked into the restaurant and saw that no one was there, I had a bad feeling.  I walked over to a waitress I knew and told her we were there for the newspaper picture.  "Oh, that was yesterday" she said.  I looked at my husband who was understandably annoyed.  The waitress told us to go down to the newspaper office and see if they could take the picture today.  The office was closed.  We walked home and I apologized for my screw-up.  The walk had left me physically drained and soaked with sweat.  When we got home I looked at my Blackberry and realized that I had marked tomorrow as the date for the lunch.  Not only had I shown up on the wrong day, but I hadn't even shown up on the date I had put in my calender.  I called the editor of the newspaper when we got home and left a message on his voicemail explaining the situation.  Then I broke down.

I cried hard for about a half hour.  This constant confusion was really starting to scare me.  My husband tried to console me, but I just laid on my bed and played a game on the computer.  About ten minutes later there was a knock on the door.  It was Hannah, our babysitter.  I had asked her if she could pull some weeds for me since the hotels gardens were getting so overgrown.  This only made me cry harder. 

Gardening has always been my zen time.  I love playing in the dirt and experimenting with new succulents I find in the wild.  In the past, gardening has helped get me through some tough times. A few days ago it was really warm so I decided to enjoy the weather out in the garden.  After about 10 minutes after weeding and pruning I was sweating profusely and lightheaded.  I went back inside and felt horrible for about the next hour or so.  Obviously I wasn't going to be able to take care of the grounds while I was experiencing a flare.  I wonder if  this flare will ever end?